Everybody has that one relationship they
forever regret ending - the one that, after
doing a lot more dating, they realize was
actually pretty great. If you ask anyone why
they ended those relationships, you can
probably expect to hear one of these reasons.
Here are 7 common things women feel should
mark the end of a relationship that usually
should not.
1. He won't move in with you yet
A lot of women have a sort of a timeline for
their relationship. They believe that by some
particular year (for many women it’s between
year 1 and year 3) they should be moved in
with their boyfriend. However, if the man fails
to suggest it, or even rejects the idea when they
bring it up, many women will call it quits.
Why it doesn’t have to end:
Men think about the big picture more than you
give them credit for. And a lot of men, rather
than thinking, “We’ve been dating for three
whole years” think, “We have only been
together three out of the 60-something years we
might be together.” And when you look at it
that way, waiting another year or two, if it
could keep the relationship together, is worth
it. By the way, why not to enjoy a little more
time having a place all to yourself? Probable, it
will be the last time you ever do.
2. He won’t introduce you to his family yet
Women feel more pressure than men when the
question of marriage arises. If they a particular
age still unmarried, they become less attracted
as partners. So a woman is ready to bring a guy
home after just a few months of dating, just to
show her family, “Hey! Look! I won’t end up
alone.” However, men usually need much more
time to introduce their partners to parents.
Thus, many women think the guy’s just not
serious about them.
Why it doesn’t have to end:
Women are far more comfortable leaning on
their family during emotionally trying times
like, say, during a breakup. So they don’t mind
their family knowing about every relationship
that begins and ends. But men often either don’t
feel comfortable turning to their family during
a breakup, or don’t think it’s a burden they
should put on their family, so in order for them
to take a woman home, they need to feel pretty
certain it’s the woman they’ll marry.
Meanwhile females don’t need to know they’ll
marry a male to take him home: they just need
to believe they can be happy for a few years for
now. But for men, bringing a woman home is
his subtle way of saying, “She’s the one.” That’s
worth waiting for.
3. He won’t propose yet
And here we touch upon timeline again: a lot of
women believe that if a man doesn’t propose by
some particular year x, he’s just never going to.
And they believe that if a guy goes silent when
the subject of marriage comes up, he’ll
definitely never propose.
Why it doesn’t have to end:
The truth is that women are usually always
certain of their feelings for a guy long before
the men are certain of their feelings for a
woman. You know it’s true: you probably had
to hold back your giddiness about your guy in
the first few months - or even a year - until his
enthusiasm caught up. But then, when he was
in, he was all in. Almost every woman feels
ready to marry her partner before her partner
feels ready to marry her. Your man is normal,
there is nothing wrong about it. So long as he
talks about the far away future with you
comfortably, there’s nothing to worry about.
4. You’re consumed by insecurities
Hey, we’re all head-trips. We all down-spiral
into these hurricanes of insecurities, thinking
that our partner would be better suited with a
woman the complete opposite of ourselves,
thinking we’ll turn out just like our mothers
and our marriage will turn out just like our
parents’, thinking we’ll get fat the moment we
get married. Many women get so consumed by
insecurities, but are far too proud to bring them
up to their partner, so, rather than live in
turmoil, they just end the relationship, leaving
a very confused man behind.
Why it doesn’t have to end:
Well, your boy has seen enough chick flicks
you’ve dragged him to to know that women
have those thoughts. He won’t think you need
to be committed to the psych ward if you share
your insecurities with him. If he loves you,
he’ll do what’s within his means to ease those
insecurities. And you know what? You’ll have
those insecurities with anybody you date, so it’d
be a shame to walk away from a great guy, only
to date a sea of mediocre men, who will still
elicit those feelings.
5. You don’t feel excited all the time
Feelings of infatuation are some of the greatest
in the world. You always feel like your partner
is on the exact same wavelength as you - he’s
tired when you are, happy when you are, horny
when you are, depressed when you are. You
think, “This is what life is for! This is what
marriage is supposed to be like!” So, when you
suddenly feel out of sync with your partner, it’s
easy to think the excitement was all hormones,
and this is the wrong guy.
Why it doesn’t have to end:
We’re all subject to the same chemicals and
hormones, and studies have found there is in
fact an infatuation phase that ends (at around 2
or 3 years) and while that can be a let down, it
only feels bad for a little bit: you’re just
comparing how it is to that euphoria it used to
be, so of course that will depress you. But if you
stick it out, and focus on having good
conversations with your partner, and doing
things that you bond over, you can actually
reach a new, deeper kind of excitement.
6. You feel your career is stifled
A lot of women are very driven when they’re
single, but when they fall in love, something
happens. Suddenly, there’s a boyfriend to see
instead of attending another networking event.
And suddenly it seems like it’s either got to be
the boyfriend or career.
Why it doesn’t have to end:
Newsflash: this is just a problem of being self-
disciplined! And if you’re not, you’ll always
find something to hold you back from your
career, from your social life to traveling to a
new dog. A good, healthy relationship can
actually enhance your career. If you bounce
ideas off your partner, and lay down ground
rules about days and hours you need to set
aside to work, you can be mentally energized by
your relationship and thrive in your work.
7. His career is stifled
There’s something so appealing about the
creative, entrepreneurial types — until they are
turned down the twelfth time for a grant, or
they have to move into their parent’s place to
save money on rent and save up capital. Some
women can start to feel they’ll face a life of
struggle with a partner like this, and leave.
Why it doesn’t have to end:
Guess what? A guy with a totally “stable” job
could be in his parent’s house at the blink of an
eye. There’s no such thing as a “stable” job—
there’s only such thing as stable passion and
ambition. And a man who has those will
always find a way to succeed. And you know
what? They tend to be happier than the guy at
the “stable” job that he couldn’t care less about.
If you want to be somebody’s wife one day,
you’ll have to wait out hard times. So long as
your partner is actually trying his hardest
every day, start practicing patience now.
So dear women, please, think twice before
making a decision you might later regret.
